The hidden rules that govern our lives

Sometimes, teachers have the honor of being the students. Today was one of those days. The staff and faculty at KCKCC had the opportunity to attend a seminar given by Dr. Bethany Tucker, author of "Understanding and Engaging Under-Resourced College Students." Since the population we serve includes a large number of students who come from poverty, many of whom are the first in their families to attend college, the information was especially relevant and valuable.

Dr. Tucker spoke of the resources that people have in various quantities and forms that aid or detract from their ability to accomplish what they want in life. We often think of the resource of finances, and this is important, but there are several other resources such as emotional health, a support system, and mental/cognitive ability.

One resource which I found especially interesting is knowledge of hidden rules. Different classes (as well as cultures, genders, races, etc.) follow different rules that work well for those who know them, but can be a barrier to those who do not. Using a broad paintbrush, recognizing that these are patterns and not necessarily accurate for every individual, Dr. Tucker covered some of the hidden rules of the three major economic classes: poverty, middle class, and wealth. As educators, we need to recognize these hidden rules so that we can teach them to our students, not because middle class rules are better than those of the lower class, but because they are the rules followed in college and most professional workplaces. If this is where our students want to be, then they need to learn the language.

One hidden rule, for example, governs time. In general (again, a pattern only) the present is most important for those in poverty. She called this the tyranny of the present. Decisions are based on the current feelings, perceived needs, or crises, so that it is difficult to consider and work for far distant future goals. For the middle class, the future is most important, so decisions today are based on future ramifications.

Each of these mindsets has advantages. A life lived entirely in the present will never be able to enjoy future security or achievement, but a life lived totally in the future will never enjoy all the beauty and joy of the moment. To help our students become bilingual, to help them achieve greater education and exercise more control over their own lives, we need to teach them strategies for planning ahead, setting goals and working toward them.

The hidden rules are almost endless and difficult to uncover and teach. I'm interested to hear about other hidden rules of which you are aware.