She's been struggling for some weeks now with the fact that she has not heard God talk. It makes no sense to her that she keeps talking to God, but never hears anything back. I've tried telling her about all the ways God speaks to us- through scripture, nature, other people, that still small voice, but it's no good. She firmly believes that God can, and should, speak to her audibly, and all I can think to say is, "why not?"
And so now she prays, "Thanks for nothing."
I visited my grandmother today, the greatest woman of faith I have ever known. I asked her what to tell Aliyah, my little girl who is angry with a God who isn't talking to her. Her answer, "It's remarkable that a child her age is even asking the question. What do you tell her? I don't know. I still ask the same question myself, and if I haven't figured it out yet, after 91 years, you can't expect a 5-year-old to understand."
She went on to talk about her struggles with her faith, the questions that frustrate her still, and her own fears. She keeps looking, asking, reading, wondering. She's not angry, just still growing and listening. She, too, wants to hear God. "Don't worry," she tells me, "Aliyah will keep praying, and eventually she will hear God's voice."
Why not?
5 comments:
Dagney - What a profound story. I have no idea how I would respond. Your grandmother shared solid wisdom. Your post helps me to think more about my own faith and prayers.
Andrew Conard
I remember this one time when I heard God calling my name, it actually woke me up. I thought it was my mom even though I knew it was not my mom's voice, or any other voice I could recognize. This was over 20 years ago. I still remember it and shiver.
Most of the time I speak to my kids without words. We hug, we kiss, we cuddle. We play silly games that make no sense whatsoever other than feeling close to each other.
Most of my life God has spoken to me that way.
Aliyah is a very special girl!
"Out of the mouths of babes," come some of the most thought provoking words. My personal experience is that it is at those times when we are frantically seeking God's guidance that we miss it by trying too hard to hear. Psalms 46:10 admonishes us to "Be still and know that I am God." God can speak to us in many ways that a child might understand... the cycle of seasons, the wonder of the universe and the beauty of nature for example. It sounds like your daughter is in that frantic state of trying to understand the need for prayer, which is perfectly natural for a child. Your grandmother is right, she will hear eventually.
Steven's sermon @ FirstLight this morning made me think of Aliyah. It was all about listening for the voice of God (and being able to tell what is and what isn't the voice of God).
I've struggled with that exact same question for some time now. It's been really hard on me and my faith. I'm not quite sure why God don't just tell us what he wants us to do. Truly, I've never written a book and gave it to my kids for them to figure out, I just tell them what I expect of them and what will happen if they disobey. It seems God could do the same.
Post a Comment